In a homeschooling house full of 7 kids & 3 guniea pigs....there is never a dull moment! A lot of people show genuine concern for us and want to know how we are doing, as the road we've left behind was not a pleasant one. So, here I am, to tell some of our stories...share some of our days...and open up a part of our world to you! Come join us on our journey so you won't miss the moments that take our breath away!
Thursday, January 15, 2015
My Last Labor Story,
begins to unfold....
This pregnancy has been unbelievably...EASY. People often wonder how any woman can carry a baby for 9 months, then deliver not ever knowing she was pregnant. I get it...I really get it. I was not one of those women, but having gone thru this pregnancy....I really do get it. Had I not shown, or felt my baby kick (which mind you did not even happen until almost 22 weeks)...I honestly would not have known I was pregnant. During the first two trimesters, the only "ailments" were that I had was a severe UTI and a suspected allergy to the glue in toilet paper (ouch, just don't ask).
From day 1, we knew we were having a homebirth this time so, I chose not to tell anyone my actual "due date". I have been induced all 7 times prior and have never carried a baby more than 12 days past my due date, but even on those 11 days past my due date when I was induced, my body has never shown any signs whats so ever that it was anywhere near ready to begin labor. So, I knew going into this, that I would carry well over my "due date". So much pressure surrounds a due date and I didn't want to fall into that frustration. Two weeks before your due, the phone calls increase and the questions begin and with each of those I am one to weaken. It makes me feel very stressed and pressured, it makes me feel like my body is broken and something must be wrong because otherwise I would have had baby. Having suffered very difficult and painful pregnancies, I've been left begging for inductions by 37 weeks and all by twice I have been induced on or before my due date. I have proven time and time again that I do not deal well with pressure to preform when it comes to having a baby. I've never allowed anyone to wait in the waiting room at the hospital because, under so much pressure of having people wait for me to perform, I never could progress. Phone calls are the same. More than once, I've been in active labor in the hospital only to receive a phone call of someone checking to see how far along I was or if the baby had arrived yet and with each and every one of those phone calls...my labor stopped.
So....here I am. "OVERDUE". I've carried this little man well beyond the point I have carried any other of my children. I started encountering some problems at week 36. My blood pressure went haywire, my baby went transverse, my pubic symphisis dysfunction came back (THANK YOU for staying away for so long) along with a few other issues. By week 38-39 our little guy settled into a breech position. At my last weekly appointment, we knew we were preparing for a breech delivery. A third midwife was scheduled to attend my birth and we discussed and altered my birth plan. I increased my "birth team", aka support for both me and my children. It was quite an empowering moment actually. For the first time...I trusted my body, my baby and my ability to birth my baby no matter what his position, I trusted that I could do this. I have a very trained and confident birth team and all the right support and though an OB would not only never let me carry beyond that point, they would also never even entertain the thought of allowing me to deliver breech and here I was with a baby engaged in breech position past my due date and I was preparing for his breech delivery at home and feeling so confident about it. As I learned more about what to expect, I admit I was definately not looking forward to it, but....I felt more prepared for the challenges that laid ahead.
I have worked for months to get my house to a certain level of "ready" I kept saying he couldn't come, until I was ready. Just three hours after I had that "Aaaaaahhhhhhh" moment and said he could come, he gave us the absolute most amazing belly dance show ever! For about 30 min he was rumbling and tumbling all over the place. Hawk said you could see the imprint of his feet as he kicked by belly outward. I suspected he was moving out of his breech position, and after he settled, I checked his positioning and listened to his heartbeat to confirm my suspicion that YES, he did turn! He was head down!
I have had numerous bouts of "prodromal" labor. This is a first experience for me and anyone who has had it, will tell you that is SUCKS! The first time, I contracted for 4 hours. Then...it stopped. The second time...11 hours. 11!!!!! then....it stopped.
This week, my emotions have been completely all over the place. One day I just woke up irritated and it got worse from there. The next day, I was super emotional and swore if someone simply said "hi" it would make me cry, the following day, I was just "down"...the next day, I contracted for 11 hours only to have it stop. That brings us to today...today, i'm exhausted. I don't want to move. I have no appetite, I can't force myself to eat. My cervix and uterus just plain hurt, even though my contractions weren't painful yesterday, my uterus did indeed work...for 11 hours, lol and...it hurts :D
Although I am becoming impatient and I am miserably uncomfortable and frustrated that I "labor" so much and still do not have a precious baby to hold...I truly do embrace each "extra" day I have being pregnant. These are days I will probably never be ready to end and I know with 99.9% certainty, that this is really it for me. So, I remind myself that I will never be pregnant again...it makes it much easier to deal with one more day and I know..that I can't stay pregnant forever.
and so, my last birth story begins to unfold.....